How to set boundaries with your work.

Part Two: Our relationship with work and how to be productive without becoming a workaholic.

Today’s post can be read as a standalone article, but it’s also a continuation from Friday’s post, which you can check out here:

Is that high-paying job you hate really worth it?

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Choose the type of worker you want to be. 🧑‍💼

Let’s talk about our relationship with work for a minute.

From what I see, there are three general profiles as to how people relate to their work. If more come to mind as you’re reading, feel free to share them in the comments. For now, here’s what I’ve observed:

1. The workaholic: This is the person who works nonstop (or somewhere near it). They find their worth in their work or making money or both. They either really love what they do or they’re addicted to getting rich.

2. The underachiever: This is the person who does the bare minimum at work. They either hate their job or can’t see it as anything but a conduit to a paycheck. They’re often bored, disinterested, and just want to go home.

3. The balancer: This person works hard during work hours, but limits their work time to make room for family and other hobbies. They see value in what they do and generally enjoy their work time, yet they recognize that work is not ultimate. For most people, this is the “sweet spot” to aim for when it comes to work.

Here’s the deal: “the average person will spend 90,000 hours at work over [their] lifetime.”¹

That’s a third of your adult life.

A THIRD!

Ideally, you shouldn’t need to allocate more than a third of your life to work. If you think about it, that’s already a ton of your time. What, then, can you accomplish in that one-third that you will both enjoy and make adequate money doing?

For those of you reaching for the back arrow, stop putting this question off! NOW is the best time to ask it! Most of us don’t realize how much time we actually spend working until we’re already years into a particular career, at which point it’s much more difficult to forge a new path. It’s not impossible, but certainly harder - especially if you then have a family depending on you.

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What do you want out of your career? ✍️

In the abstract, most of us know it’s important to set boundaries with our work. The “workaholic” lifestyle is a popular cultural trope, and for good reason: you probably know a workaholic.

Maybe it’s your partner. Maybe it’s your best friend. Maybe it’s your parent.

If you don’t know a workaholic, I hate to break it to you, but you might be one.

Me, taking a break from work to enjoy an iced latte with a friend this past weekend! :)

What’s fascinating is that we tend to project disdain for the workaholic lifestyle, yet we perpetuate it.

You know how it goes: We gossip about the guy who makes no time for his family because he spends 19 hours a day at work. But in the same breath, we complain that we’re not rich enough. We say we can’t stand our coworker who seems to live at the office, but we secretly wish we had the time (and drive) to be as dedicated as her.

“How can anyone care that much about their job?” We wonder aloud.

The thinly veiled jealousy on our lips stems from a universal desire: the desire to be passionate about - or, better yet, to find a sense of meaning in - our work.

The best thing about career freelancing is getting to spend most of my working hours doing what I love! Holding a true passion for what I do is an incredible blessing - one I hope to never take for granted.

On the flip side, my passion for writing makes me prone to spending more time at the computer than I should. It’s also easy to slip into workaholic mode as a freelancer because my income is almost entirely determined by me - I set my pricing and choose how many projects to take on. It’s tempting to neglect my exercise routine, family/friends time, and other responsibilities to just boost my career and earn more.

So, as writers, how can we set healthy work boundaries? And what does “balance” look like when you make your own schedule?

This is difficult to answer for two reasons.

1. Everyone has a different work capacity. Maybe you’re a particularly fast typer, or perhaps you get migraines if you stare at your computer screen for more than three hours at a time. You may have ADHD or dyslexia, or a blood disorder that requires you to spend more hours sleeping per day than the average person. Maybe your partner, kid(s), or pet(s) need a few hours of your attention each day. Your capacity is determined by factors that are unique to you.

2. Everyone has a different set of needs/wants for their writing. Are you writing full-time and shooting to make a six-figure income as a freelancer? Are you writing fiction on the side for fun and to “see where it goes”? Perhaps you’re just working part-time to supplement your spouse’s income. Your business goals and the outcomes you’re looking for with your writing will change what your relationship with work looks like.

So, if everyone’s a little different, how can you set real, practical boundaries for your work?